Also known as: Her Nibs, Caroline/Caro, The Head Bitch In Charge, Oh God She's Coming Run, Advisor to the Prime Minister.
She has no official title, being some ungodly amalgamation of advisor, spin doctor, deal broker, speech writer, string-puller, puppet-master, and supreme (unelected) ruler. To the PM, depending on his current mood or situation, she’s Her, Caro, Caroline, Her Nibs, or Oh God She’s Coming Hide In A Cupboard. As far as most people in the know are concerned, she’s an Advisor with a capital A, and God help you if you imply anything more sinister.
She has a liking for white angora sweaters, yellow sapphires, Givenchy heels you could pick a lock with, and bitter-almond-scented hand soap.
She has a tendency to be hostile towards the Prime Minister's close friends- that is to say, his personal posessions and pets. To date she has directly murdered one (Larry II, a rhubarb plant) and been curiously indifferent to the sudden and mysterious death of another (Larry the cat) which occurred directly after the events of Operation Machiavelli.
As of 19/6/12, her name has been confirmed as Caroline. Whether this is her real name or not, however, remains to be seen.
- Her Nibs suggests giving it [his face] a good scrub with white spirit. (3/6/12)
- Took a pic on Edith & asked Her what it looked like, in the interests of national security, but might have caught her at a bad moment. She said it looked like an idiot waving a phone in her face. #unecessarilyharsh (21/4/12)
- Normally, something like this, [Rattmann's bridge appearance] I'd just tell Her and she'd deal with it, problem solved. Seriously wish I could right now, actually, but- But, if I tell her about this, I'll have to explain about the thing with the skip, won't I? I'll have to fill her in on the whole picture. That was AGES ago, and she'll start going on about it, and she'll probably get that Face of hers on, and it's never good, when that happens. (2/3/12)
- Basically, I threw a snowball at Her. Ohh, it was MAGNIFICENT! Bullseye. Sort of thing that makes you wish you had a replay button for real life. Utterly, utterly beautiful. POW!! Take that, lady! Now if I'M such a moron, how come YOU’RE the one stuck in the ladies picking bits of ice out of your hairdo? (5/2/12)
- But Her Nibs, oho, no, total bee in her bonnet about it! [The Companion] Fair dos, wasn't exactly painting her in a rosy light. Or me, as she pointed out. (2/2/12)
- 1.25 Oi-oi, Her Nibs is back. Brought meeting to order, despite Health & Welsh Secretaries still duking it out over last rostello foccacia. (14/1/12)
- 9.40 Everyone bored and running out of biscuits. I Asked Her if Chancellor of Exchequer actually vital to Budget meeting, Apparently he is! (14/1/12)
- Oh, wait! Ha! I’ve got it, I’ve got it, why didn’t I think of it before? Obvious, logical no-brainer; clearly, it must have been Her! Course! Plus, that explains why nobody showed up! Not because I’m in any way non-essential, but because she told them I needed a lie-in! Just goes to show; beneath the terrifying exterior, there’s a- slightly less terrifying interior! Who knew? Her Nibs, AKA, the Lemsip Fairy! Yes, we joke around- I’ll say she’s scary beyond all reason, she’ll say I’m an utter waste of space- but that’s just us, isnt it? Our thing. Because we’re mates, me and Her. Friends. Good old friends. Nice to know I’ve got a friend looking out for me. (8/1/12)
- Pulled Her out of a meeting to ask what emergency protocols there were for the Prime Minister falling horribly deathly ill. Not entirely sure she grasped the severity of the situation- threw a box of tissues at my head. (7/1/12)
- Woke up at saner time to complete chaos! Police all over the place, Her Nibs striding about, laying into chief of staff, checking CCTV, etc. Turns out, this unidentified intruder got in over the wall last night & made off with some v. sensitive material! Terrifying! They've got no idea who he was, either. Somehow dodged all the cameras, nobody got a proper look at him. Man alive, she is FURIOUS. Best not to mention skip incident. She's got enough on her plate with this mystery terrorist, doesn't need to worry about hamster bloke too. (3/1/12)
- Finally got to VIP area around half 12. She was absolutely livid! Mayor was there too though so I sort of got away with it. (1/1/12)
- Just looking over the New Year Honour list. Who ARE half these people? Must ask Her for a quick Who's Who in case I get quizzed tonight. (31/12/11)
- Oh my god, I'm knackered. Told Her I was up all night worrying about affairs of state. Actually it was the bloody Sudokube. (30/12/11
- Right, so this whole 'brevity' thing is trickier than it looks, but I'll get the hang of it. If Her Nibs can do it, so can I. (28/12/11)